BBQ Right
I like an old proper BBQ me. I’m talking about the sturdy, decent, made-out-of-brick kind that my grandad built with his bare hands. The basic kind which is almost prehistoric, but works perfectly well. I ask you dear reader: what is wrong with that?
But there is an enemy, of course, and it is in every garden centre throughout the modern world. It’s what the Green Goblin is to Batman: it is the dreaded gas BBQ, of course. The intruder. The high-spec, instantly-starting machine that will eventually drive the good old-fashioned BBQ in to the ground. I hate this contraption! Which is why, whenever I am in a garden centre, I will happily walk over to people looking to buy one of these machines and start putting them off and telling them whatever it takes to get them to listen. As they stare at me oddly, I make out I am a man with expertise on the matter and then I begin to fill their heads with tales of old-fashioned BBQs and why they should stick with a brick one. Nine times out of ten it works a treat! Sometimes I am intercepted by an employee who knows my face, but I have learnt to run fast away from them. Fitness is a necessary evil when you are defending such greatness. It’s a small price to pay.
I bet some of you are now asking “but what is it that you really have against the gas BBQ? It’s efficient, it’s quick and it’s good. Why do you loathe it so?” Well, that’s as may be, but it doesn’t change the fact that it ruins a BBQ experience. Think of the children people! Think of all the poor children forced to grow up with a gas BBQ. Now remember the days before gas–see what I am saying?
Speaking of awesome times with friends: news on the holiday, I have finally been able to figure out what everyone is going to owe me for the Caravan insurance for our holiday this October. Please make an effort to get this to me by Tuesday so I can get it sorted out before we are ready to leave.
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